Friendships Redesigned

As appeared on Wonder MomsGrowing up I had many friends. There were friends from school and friends from ice skating. When my mom died those friends faded away. They didn’t know how to handle the motherless kid. Slowly I made friends in secondary school who didn’t know my mom. Nonetheless making friends was not my strong suit. A coping and survival tool is to be self-reliant.

Through my various jobs I made work friends. They were there for work rants and coffee breaks. At Christmas parties we were comrades. As they moved on to other jobs, or I did, those friendships faded to an occasional email or a Facebook post.

From party friends to work friends the glue was a common bond. When that bond became unglued the friendship faded into the past. I could count on one hand how many unconditional friends I do have.

When I became a mom it changed again. From mommy groups to park dates a whole new world opened up. Everywhere we went a familiar sense of belonging abounded. Once maternity leaves were over and I stayed home, some friends became weekend and birthday party mates. The isolation set in. I began to go online. Then I met Twitter.

Many times a day I would log in. In the wee hours rocking my baby I would hold my smartphone and tweet others. I connected with many moms who were doing the exact same thing. We conversed over many things. Some were local whom I never would have met otherwise. Across the world I have many online friends. There are friends that I never have met in real life yet they have earned my trust and respect. Some I now have met in person.

I tweet a lot with fellow motherless moms. That common bond has meant the world to me. For years I felt alone. Twitter connections have made my daily life a little brighter and a lot less lonely.

Is it possible to have hundreds of friends online? I say yes.

One thought on “Friendships Redesigned

  1. I can totally relate. I have only one friend remaining from my school days. We’ve been friends since grade one and I think that unless one moves FAR away we’ll be friends for life. Even then we don;t see each other often. I work, she stays home. She lives in downtown Vancouver, I live in the ‘burbs.

    I have a very difficult time making new friends. And I always seem to join or get involved in real life groups that while we may have a similar interest, there is little beyond that. Throw kids in the mix and setitng up time to hang with a friend can be almost impossible.

    This is one reason I’ve loved blogging and twitter. Maybe I’ll never meet these people in real life but I fell like I’m not so alone. My husband doens’t get that at all which is partially the reason I’ve pulled back a bit.

    That and it was taking up a LOT of my time 🙂

    Like

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