“Mommy, why can’t I have chocolate now?” as my four-year-olds scrunchy face is staring at me. I think she is trying to stare me down. My mind races for an answer she might actually hear. I tried simple ‘no’ and that backfired to here.
“You cannot have chocolate for breakfast because it would not taste good. Chocolate is only a snack food in the afternoons. That is when it tastes the best.” My lie sits out there like a whip cream cloud.
“Oh. Okay.” She races off to play.
I watch her and the guilt of lying to my girl weighs heavily on my brain. Every hour when my kids are awake I am faced with (as every parent) how much truth you tell your children. When our loved ones passed away we told our kids what happened in toddler terms. We didn’t lie. We told them how they got sick and never got better. Now they are angels and feel better.
When a friend doesn’t call for a play date I am faced with the question of ‘why?’ My heart knows I can’t shelter them for too long. Reality and other school children will infiltrate their world. If it is a serious issue I will address what is needed. We have our family values and hope our children will uphold them as they grow up.
As I watch my two daughters run around squealing with happiness, I vow to keep them as innocent as I can. Knowing that is what I can do for now as their mom lightens my heart. I will always try to be as honest as I can with them, but in their terms they can understand. When they are honest with me on who broke what, they are never punished. There are consequences for their actions, but they are never reprimanded for being honest.
Okay maybe the chocolate lie was off kilter from the truth. How do you handle the day-to-day honesty with your kids?
I’ve found that I’m like you: when it comes to death or the BIG things I try to be as open and up front as possible…but if my kids want that last piece of cake and I already ate it? “Oh, I think you already finished that cake off. Sorry sweetie”
Or if they want chocolate before breakfast I tell them no…and then sneak a piece for myself LOL
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🙂 *crinkle* (hiding wrappers.)
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Hardly a lie! Agree with Carrie. Worry about the big stuff … for now…:)
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